You can help by including your partner in the care of your newborn baby. Take advantage of his offers to spend one-on-one time with your baby. Your partner may do things differently from you, but try to look past that. He needs to do things in his own way, and he and your baby will be just fine. Try to ask for what you need – whether it’s for help with laundry or cooking or just holding the baby so you can get some rest – don’t be afraid to ask for help from your partner.
Offer to help lighten her load. Whether it’s offering to pick up dinner on your way home or change the baby so she can rest or throw a load of laundry in the washing machine – you’re a team and working together to create a harmonious family is your goal. It may seem like your partner is criticizing everything from the way you’re changing the diaper to how you’re holding the baby, but it’s generally because she is hyper aware and super protective of every aspect of caring for your baby right now. As you both become more confident as parents, this will pass so try not to be offended by her requests, and try to be as patient with her as you can.
Seeking out counseling to work on your relationship is not a sign of failure; it shows a great strength that you have recognized that things aren’t going as well as they used to.